Two Small Fish Bible Study
Bible Study Sept 26, 2005
Philemon
Part
3:
Introduction:
Core of the Lesson: Reconciliation and True Forgiveness
1. If he forgave Onesimus, Philemon’s authority would be placed in jeopardy and other slaves might run away and never return, thereby, costing him even more money. Anytime we’re asked to forgive someone, we’re faced with possible loss and humiliation. We might have to assume some of the responsibility that caused the situation. We have to give up some of our pride to forgive. We have a tendency to enjoy the superior feeling of having someone indebted to us.
2. Philemon had to agree to cancel Onesimus’ indebtedness. Paul obviously knew that money would become an issue eventually and he wanted to make sure that nothing hindered Philemon from true forgiveness. When we forgive completely, we can hold nothing for later use against our offender.
3. Philemon had to accept Onesimus as a brother. Their relationship would drastically change forever. We become accustomed to disliking our offenders. One of the most difficult aspects of forgiveness is the shift from enemy to friend. Although we may never consider that individual a close friend, true forgiveness enables us to desire the best for him/her.
Philemon practiced mercy and brotherly love to those he considered his equal. The challenge surfaced with showing the same considerations to someone socially beneath him. But, Paul didn’t point to Philemon’s shortcomings. Instead, he carefully listed the good works that Philemon had faithfully performed in the name of Jesus.
Perhaps God had been dealing with Philemon on the issues of forgiveness and the treatment of his slaves for some time. Onesimus’ return served as a test to Philemon’s willingness to totally trust and obey God rather than manmade laws.
By law, Philemon had the right to make a public example of Onesimus. By law, he could have had Onesimus put to death. But, those were the laws of the government, not God’s laws. Paul reminded Philemon of the forgiveness he had received – that was God’s law – what you have received freely, freely give.
Philemon had risked a lot through forgiving Onesimus. But, he had a lot more to lose if he withheld forgiveness. He was the leader of the small group of believers that met in his house. They were watching him as children watch their fathers. If he refused to comply with Paul’s request, he’d lose their respect and Paul’s.
If he chose not to forgive, Philemon risked entangling himself in the shackles of an unforgiving spirit, which would eventually corrode his good works and fill him with bitterness and anger.
However, the greatest thing Philemon risked losing was his relationship with the Lord. Jesus taught his disciples the importance of forgiveness. According to Matthew 6:14-15, “For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins” (NIV). This is the legal side of forgiveness. Sins or offenses disrupt human relationships. Reconciliation occurs through forgiveness alone. To refuse to forgive and be reconciled to others is disobedience to God’s will for us and bars us from His forgiveness. We receive His forgiveness when we repent and willing forgive our offender.
But, through Jesus Christ’s work on the cross, we have an even higher calling of forgiveness. He paid the price so that we can be forgiven and reconciled with God. Since God forgave us for Jesus’ sake, we, too, must forgive for Jesus’ sake. (Ephesians 4:32)
Conclusion and Challenge:
I believe we have enough evidence of Philemon’s character and his love for Jesus to be certain that he forgave Onesimus, but could Philemon forget the offense? The answer is no. God created us to remember the offense. The hurt will subside in time. But, the scar remains. And God uses it to remind us of our sins and the pain we’ve caused others so that we can become more compassionate and Christ-like.
Satan likes to use it too. He reminds us of the pain it caused and tries to convince us that we really have not forgiven because we have not forgotten. All we have to do is tell him the truth – we choose to forgive and to continue to forgive until the wound is completely healed. Forgiveness is a process. It takes time to restore a broken relationship. Like anything else, the length of time depends on the severity and the longevity of the offense. Forgiveness begins on the inside and works its way out. We may experience tenderness in that relationship for months or even years, but the healing begins and ends with forgiveness.
Prayer
Requests:
Tammy, Melinda, Jordan, Hurricane Victims and the volunteers who are giving so much of themselves to help, Joey, Phyllis, Eddie, our Monday Bible Study, and remember me, Brenda Hendricks.
May you forgive others as He has forgiven you,
Brenda Hendricks.